Monday, 15 November 2010

Too much going on in my head!!!

Im surronded by lists yet usual to-do list, ideas for xmas pressie list, pressies that i have brought list, what i want for xmas list....argh!!! I keep having to tell myself that i dont have to rush about for xmas as i have plenty of time, but i never know what is gonna happen in my life and i dont want to have to worry about pressies incase i do get a chest infection or anything. I know thats abit of a negative way to think but im just being realistic!! I offically started my xmas shopping on saturday evening as that was my first online purchase done - yay!! Im not going to mention what pressies i have brought people on here as i know certain people read this and i like people to be surprised :) However, any ideas as for what to buy Scott would be welcomed (just email me on facebook or something) as all he keeps going on about is a damn 3d television which is abit out of my price range thank you very much lol!!

Also sitting next to my lists is court papers. This was what greeted me when i got back from York. Im not going to go on about it as im too angry to even start speaking about it again but basically i appealled their decision to put me in the 'back to work' group as i dont need help getting work, its a case of me not being well enough to work. They are now saying that i have to go to court to take my case furthur because they believe that i am well enough to attend the meetings for the 'back to work' group. They sent me the criteria information as to who qualifys to be in the other group, and to put it bluntly, you have to be practically a vegetable! But can you tell me what the point is, of going to these meetings to help me back to work if im not well enough to go to work. They totally agree that im not well enough to work but their claim is that i am well enough to attend the meetings....please tell me what the point is in that?? Isnt that wasting mine and their time??

Tuesday i went clinic and my lung function had increased upto 24% and it WILL continue to increase!! My weight increased by 0.1kgs but we were all happy with that as i had done lots of exercise on holiday and not had too many feeds but, in the words of Tesco - every little helps :D We are still trying to sort out my diabetes as sometimes i have high blood sugars and sometimes they plummet so its too dangerous for me to have insulin at the moment until its sorted out as i dont want to end up in a diabetic coma!! Ive got to monitor my blood sugars all through-out the day until my appointment on tuesday...this results in me attempting to prick my finger about 3am when my feed finishes...great one!!

I have also now made up my mind that i strongly dislike one of my doctors even more after this clinic. When i had all the probs with my peg, she did nothing and didnt listen to me in any way, just kept throwing anti-sickness and heartburn medicine at me...and we all know now that the sickness and burn was because the tube was lodged in my bowel...anyway, i havent seen her properly since, until this clinic. She knows how nervous i am about anything to do with my peg (for obvious reasons), although i am getting better and dont check every few hours anymore to see if its still there!! She felt my stomach and was pushing over my scars, which im funny about people touching and then without warning just turned my peg all the way round really fast which pissed me off bigtime!! Then she was checking all my tablets and asked if i was still getting heartburn and if i was still on anti-sickness....erm no!!! I havent been on them since may and it wasnt fucking heartburn or reflux, it was the bastard peg many more times!!!

I also have a reciepe for muffins...not normal muffins...1000 calorie muffins!! I went out and brought all the ingredients before the weekend and then decided to make them today but realised i didnt have a muffin tin...and i still dont have a muffin tin, because i brought a yorkshire pudding tin instead. I thought they were the same but apparently not (the muffin tins are deeper) so im sulking and refusing to go out again so will now make them tomorrow afternoon instead.

God...this was a long post wasnt it!! That will teach me to leave it a week to update!

x Lots of love x

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